On the Verge of Dating White Girls

Movie: Diary of a Tired Black Man

The Movie Coming Soon...
The Black Men's Turn to exhale.
Personally, I couldn't even watch "Waiting to Exhale."  Even then I was way tired of the mainstream media rubbing the Black Man's image in the ground in the name of "entertainment."  Now comes a film that may offer a counter to what has become acceptable: Bashing Black Men.  If anything, I'm sure "The Diary of a Tired Black Man" attempts to reveal a perspective of Black men often ignored by women who wouldn't dare look at themselves to confront "The Truth." Although the film is about interracial dating, it's about why he goes there: Angry Black Women!  I guess it's like the CD "Niggaz and White Girls," it just gives his artistic explanation. 
However, I bet the creator, Tim Alexander will catch more slack than "Waiting to Exhale" did awards.  Here's the interview with Tim Alexander on the Michael Baisden Radio Show.

DPM: The Blackest Black Man Ever

When just being Black ain't enough!

I gotta admit, the mind is a mother'. I've always fantasized about being the Blackest dude ever and now I have no choice...

Yes, my son lives with his mother and her white boyfriend... so that means I have to be "The Equalizer." Meaning: I gotta balance that shit out.  In other words my crib is the "BLACKEST HOUSE..."

1. Where we can't watch television programs dominated by white people. 
2. Where The NBA is background scenery.
3. Where no white girls venture.
4. Where we cheer for  Black boxers and we get mad when they get their asses beat.
5. Where any song at anytime can be a quiz, "Who's this rapping?" or "Spell Luther Vandross."
6. Where I drink EVERYTHING out of my Shaka Zulu Mug.
7. Where I have the largest collection of Black action figures.
8. Where I drive the original white OJ Simpson SUV
9. Where I live on Martin Luther King Jr. Way
10. Where I have 2 over sized autographed Public Enemy artifacts
11. Where almost every wall has a different African mask.
12. Where the Blackest Black Man Ever Resides!

The "Blackest House" is where the Blackest Black Man lives in order to balance out the whiteness whackness of his son's mama's house and her white man.  Failure to be the Blackest Black Man could result in lil' dpm to view the world in an unrealistic way. 

The advantages of living in the Blackest House:

1. 9-year-old's can watch a rated "R" film if Denzel is it.
2. 9-year-olds can watch Martin Lawrence, Dave Chapell and old school Eddie Murphy...
3. 9-year-olds get to hear me lecture on sports.
4. 9-year-olds get to ride in my OJ Simpson "Juice Truck"
5. 9-year-olds don't have to eat sour cream.
6. 9-year-olds don't get poisoned by MTV or BET.
7. 9-year-olds can listen to Hip-Hop uncensored.
8. 9-year-olds can sit, concentrate and get beat in chess by yours truly while I clean the house at the same time (did i mention there is non PS2?  Nah, the Blackest House has a PS1.  I keep it old school)
9. 9-year-olds get to hang out with DPM and get a constant dosage of DPizM.

Overall The Blackest House, where the Blackest Black Man Ever lives, is oftentimes the "Blackest Place on Earth!  Where nathan is beyond rithickulous!

I'm looking into opening the Blackest House to the public as an amusement park.  I keep thinking the whole world needs to visit the "Blackest House."  It's only right...

The Supa CBBW

Supa On the Verge with DPM

Let's see... This weekend I caught up with Supa in LA for a minute...  And you know, had a couple of drizzles...   I'm happy to say that she is sour cream free and is pretty much a Supa CBBW.  Other than that, it was all glittah. 

*Side note:  to live in drive in LA is rithickulous!  And it didn't help that I ran up on a fatal accident acoss the street from where I was staying in Long Beach/Compton.  RIP little man...

Weekly Word on "The Verge" Rithickulous

Let's all say, "Re-thick-kew-lus" adj.

Definition:

A combination of the words "RIDICULOUS" and "THICK". Meaning "ridiculously thick" or a "whole bunch of."  Rithickulous is often used to describe a woman with large voluptuous assets.  Rithickulous can also be used to describe any extreme situation.

Rithickulously-adverb, Rithickulousness-noun

On the Verge sentence:

1. Did you see that girl in those jeans?  She was straight up rithickulous!
2. The club was rithickulously banging last night!

The Power of the Nipple

Nature's heal-it-all antidote for "The Verge."

My son is half way grown at 9-years-old and if I go in his room right now and peak at him I know 2 things:

1. (1) he's asleep
2. (2) he's puckering his mouth and going through the motions as if he is still breast feeding like a little baby..

And don't get dude wrong, he was weaned after 2 years with no argument. But he still silently dreams about it.  It's evident. And when I think about it, I remember when dude would be nursing with his eyes rolling to the back of head fighting sleep, and the only thing that kept him feeding was the fact that he could see me watching.  It was almost as if he was looking at me and indulging in the nipple just to let me know he could--and I couldn't. I was never mad at him, but I saw what was happening...

I'm saying, I'm a grown ass man and there's only a few fantasies that top a chocolate nipple melting in my mouth.  I guess considering the episodic relationships that I've experienced "On The Verge" and beyond, I have an indescribable feeling to see that my son has the same inherent weakness that has most men possess: 2 be Mothered.  Although I don't dream about breast feeding, I do dream about a woman's touch in my life and her presence to retreat to after a day of walking "The Verge."

For instance:...

On the Verge of Being Tagged (again)

Who starts these tags?  Am I a bad sport because I hate tags?  As much as I appreciate the thought that somebody would tag me, I just don't get it. I'm saying, can't I disgust sour cream without a clear reason?  Can't I attract CBBW's with the secrete of my own dysfunctional ambiguity? Can't I contradict my ideas of singlehood and marriage in the same week without eluding to the historic sources of my stances? Not that any of these tags directly address any of the above issues... But I find it hard to maintain my DPizM and answer any questions directly.  It's almost as if the imagined mystique of DPM is peeled away when I'm tagged. OTV is a place where I randomly unveil... whatever.  It's really hard for me to list my favorite foods or movies.  In case y'all ain't noticed the Verge fluctuates.  It's random.  It is a very slippery place for any direct answers.  It's DPizM.

Hence:

4 jobs I've had in my life include

1. Herpetologist
2. Thief
3. Kosher butcher
4. Spooky the Corporate Slave

the DPizM flirting analysis

(according to Supa's survey thing) I'm a "Natural Flirt" On the Verge...

Believe it or not, I'm a really effective flirt.  Slightly pimpish. And I'm so good, you hardly notice that I'm flirting with your fine ass.  My attitude, and confidence make me a natural flirt.  And the fact that I don't even know that I'm as good as I am makes me that much more attractive! Glittah baby.  Glittah...

What Kind of Flirt Are You?

Black people and tipping

First of all, I tip because it’s customary.  Second of all, I tip because good service deserves it.  Thirdly, I tip because I can afford to do so…

Although I tip respectfully, it’s impossible for me to tip without the very careful thought of, “How much should I tip?”  Yes, I know what’s “reasonable,” what’s “fair,” and what’s “generous.” However when my waiter is White I feel like the service to a me as a Black man  (even toward a group of me(s)..) purposely varies.  So, as a result, so does my tipping range.

I could be wrong, but I think that a lot (not all) of waiters and waitresses work for tips and they have ways of showing disapproval when they feel slighted by a customer.  Often times they express their disappointment prematurely by providing less than “quality” service compared to other nearby patrons.  Too many times I’ve sat at a table or even stood at a bar for longer than I felt necessary while I watched others around me get much better service...

Weekly Word on "The Verge" Glitter

Say "Gli-TAH"

Glitter (slang): To accent a good time, concept, sensation.  Sometimes used as an acceptable exaggeration.

Alternative spellings: 1. glittah  or 2. gitta'

On the Verge sentence: "Man, my weekend was straight glitta'!" (or) "I'm bout to get glittah tonight with this drizzle." (or) "Blood, did you see that girl?! She was glitter boy!"

Sometimes glitter can be used as a salutation when referring to a pretty woman: "Hey glitta, hi you doing?"

Sometimes glitter can be used as a farewell: "Glitter man.  Do it big"

Glitter can even be used to describe a nice watch: "Yo man, that some nice glittah."

On The Verge of Food Poison...

Yeah, I'm sick.  I don't mean to leave y'all hanging.  I just cain't do nathan right now.  I hope to post when I feel a little better.

Hella sickly,

---deepium