The "Thugged Out" vs. The "Nice Guy"

It amazes me how much the Thugged out, violent and insensitive persona continues to beat out the intelligent, caring and sensative type with Black woman.
Sure, not all women choose to be with the thug type, but a lot do.  Perhaps the blame can be attached to the glamorization of thug lifstyle via videos and music.  Then again, the "bad boy" persona has been admired by women of all races since the beginning of time. 
However, in 2005 when many Black women compain about the selection of Black men, why is it that the "nice guy" approach just doesn't work for many Black women?  For instance, I've been rejected passed-up (or choose your own word) by a few sistas who chose to contnue to be with her mentally abusive and  dysfunctionally insecure boyfrined/father of her child...While she had a lot to consider since he is the father of ther child, I'm just thinking no matter the person or situation it would be best to place one's self in the healthier position, right?  I mean, then we all win.  The child as well.  And if a dude doesn't motivate himself to be a healthier person for himself, then what good is he as a father and or mate? 
You'd be surprised at the numbers of Black women that I know of that have opted for the thug/dysfunctional type instead of the nice guy.
As a result, it's tempting to tilt my hat, get a few tattoos, fatally stalking my wanna be ex-girlfriend,  and focus my mind on illegal activities and worldly values...but that really doesn't work for me in the end. At the same time it doesn't work for me to continue to see beautiful women opt for obvious ugliness.  Oh well, I guess I'm just that nice single guy--for now.

Comments

[Guy Real]

I think there is another category your overlooking. Guy with an edge but not on the edge, if you get what I mean. You don't have to be super sensitive or super disfunctional jailbound stalker in order to be apealing, I think the secret is to just be different than the rest. Looking for just a thug went out of style in high school

[Mali]

I think a nice guy who has the instincts of a MAN is a perfect catch. For the nice guys who know how to be 'rough' when necessary is attractive, sexy and stimulating.

[Anomymous]

I will take the nice guy over the thug anyday, but u r right I also believe the majority of women love the thugs.

[Monke]

It's funny because right now I'm with a "nice guy" but he's lived in the streets of "The Town" for so long that he has an edge. He's great(makes sure that home is taken care)...on the other hand after living in the streets for so long and having to be so tough, the baggage that he's collected carry's into our relationship. So where's the line...?

[luvangel330]

Many women are like that because that type of ghy is highly glamorized in movies, songs, videos, culture for blacks, whites, mexican whatever. Lucky for you there are a few smart women out there who know better...besides those girls who fall for the thugged out type are doing you a favor by blowing you off. Why would you want a woman who's so insecure about herself that she will stay with some lame thug in an unhealthy situation? There is no way she would be able to provide anything for a solid foundation...

[luvangel330]

PSS...Simular to how men are attracted to CBBW, knowing they shouldn't but can't help themselves... your the pot calling the kettle black...kinda..huh?

[Nice Lady]

Try looking for women who aren't into douches. We exist.

What we seem to have here is nice guys who seek women who seek jerks. The turn around is also true: nice women who seek guys who go for slutty bitches. The key here is for the nice men and the nice women to stop seeking out people who are into being abused and start seeking out each other.

[Nice Lady]

Oh, and also try seeking women who aren't with someone else regardless of how healthy or unhealthy that relationship is. Even if they break up with that person for you, being a rebound is a bad idea 99.99999% of the time.

And by the way, if one is down with breaking up a relationship one not that nice of a guy to begin with. Not to mention that if they'll cheat with you or leave someone for you, they're not that great of a catch either.